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	Title: Nord and Bert Couldn't Make Head or Tail of It
	Author: William Carte
	Source: QuestBusters, v4(11)
	Date: November, 1987
	Transcription by Steve Derby
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Once again Infocom has broken new ground: Written by *Ballyhoo* author Jeff
O'Neill, Nord and Bert introduces many changes to the traditional text adventure.
First of all, it's not really an adventure game but more of a word game. The
program consists of eight mini-stories for you to complete by using homonyms
(words spelled and pronounced alike but with different meanings), spoonerisms
(when you transpose word sounds, such as "lunching mobsters" and "munching
lobsters") and limericks. With titles like "Act the Part" and "Buy the Farm," each
story is completely independent of the others, and they may be played in any
order with one exception: You must complete the first seven stories before you
can do the eighth one.

In another innovation, the game requires no mapping! In fact, it is impossible to
map. Commands like east, west, up and down are no longer used. An information
bar at the top of the screen shows your current location and where you can go
from there. If you're in the living room, for instance, it says you can enter the
kitchen, basement or bathroom. To do so you just type in the name of the desired
location.

Finally, this is the first Infocom game with built-in Invisi-Clues. Type "hint"
and you'll see a new menu pertaining to the current game. Point to the word
you're stuck on, and the clues you would normally mark off with a pen are revealed
one at a time. Yes, *Nord and Bert* is definitely different. Unfortunately,
different doesn't necessarily mean good.

I used to think Infocom could not make
a bad game. That was before *A Mind Forever Voyaging* came along. Since
then, all their games have been very good ones. I suppose I have come to expect
excellence from every new Infocom product. But I'm sorry to say *Nord and
Bert* was quite a disappointment.

For one thing, I enjoy mapping. I realize I'm in the minority on this, but for me half
the fun is mapping a new game, finding secret doors and locations. I really missed
that in *Nord and Bert*. That's just a minor complaint, though, since most of you will
enjoy not having to map it.

No, the game's major flaw is that most of the puzzles make no sense. You see a
grindstone, for example, and must type "put my nose to the grindstone" to receive
a point. In another instance you see a sponge on the floor and your brother
raiding the ice box. To get a point, you have to call your brother a sponge. When
you see a book of riddles and a pile of burning foam, you must "riddle while
foam burns." These examples are actually easy compared to others in the program.
Perhaps the worst is a large rat and a nun's habit, when you must "pull rabbit out of
the hat."

Another problem is that in many cases these things serve no purpose at all other
than to award a point. Because of this, it is possible to finish each story with a less
than perfect score. In all fairness, I should point out that the first game, "Shopping
Bizarre," is a pretty good one. It deals with homonyms and actually has some
"normal" puzzles to solve. Dracula has bad breath, for instance. There is mince
on one shelf, so you can say "mints" and the mince is transformed into mints
and... well, I think you get the picture.

Another major disappointment with *Nord and Bert* is that the program is copy-protected.
Unlike other Infocom products, there is no protection scheme built into the
packaging. Instead, they put protection on side two of the game disk. Let's hope this
doesn't become standard policy. The documentation is good, though one part of
the Infocom manual that I particularly like has been removed from their games,
starting with *Lurking Horror*. That is the section showing a list of "some recognized
verbs." I had come to rely heavily on this section and now miss it.<br>
**Conclusions:** When Activision purchased Infocom there was some speculation
that an increase in the quantity of games would mean a decrease in quality.
This fear was put to rest with *Stationfall* and *Lurking Horror* but is likely to be
rekindled by *Nord and Bert*. The bottom line is that I have to force myself away
from the computer with most Infocom games, but had to force myself to the
computer to play *Nord and Bert*.

On a scale of one to ten I give this game a six, only because of the new ground
broken by the program. If you have a great vocabulary (or enjoy reading
*Webster's Dictionary*) and like limericks and word-play, you may enjoy *Nord and
Bert*. [As someone else phrased it, this game is for "word nerds."] True adventure
gamers will probably be disappointed. One final warning: Be prepared to use the
built-in clues!

<hr style="border-top: 4px double;">

**System:** IBM, Apple, ST, C 64/128, Amiga<br>
**Skill Level:** Intermediate<br>
**Price:** $34.95, C-128; $39.95, others<br>
**Company:** Infocom
