<!--
	Title: (Scorpion's Tale) Hollywood Hijinx
	Author: Scorpia
	Source: Computer Gaming World, 7(3)
	Date: April 1987
	Transcription by Steve Derby
-->

<img class="float-left" src="/public/img/articles/cgw-scorpions-tale-amfv/scorpions-tale-logo-amfv.png" alt="Scorpion's Tale logo">
<img class="float-right" src="/public/img/articles/cgw-scorpions-tale-hollywood-hijinx/buddy-burbank-photo.jpg" alt="Buddy Burbank photo from Hollywood Hijinx packaging">

Well, I see it's that time of year again...
spring (already?), when a young person's fancy
turns to adventure games. So just step right
in, settle into your usual chair, and Fred will pour
you a tall, cool one. Something you'll
probably need, as in a short time you'll be on
your way to Tinseltown to indulge in some
*Hollywood Hijinx*.

Good ol' Uncle Buddy. He was a real fun guy.
Of course, you'd expect that from the producer of
such box-office busters as "Vampire Penguins of
The North", "You Can't Fight City Hall-But You
Can Blow It Up!", "Slash and Chop Sock Hop", and
the controversial "Atomic Chihuahuas From Hell",
to name only a few.

Alas, Uncle Buddy is gone, and now his wife,
Aunt Hildegarde, has gone to join him in that great
Grauman's Chinese in the sky. However, since you
can't take it with you, they've left behind a tidy
little estate. Being childless, they decided to leave
their earthly goodies to one of their many nieces
and nephews. Which one? Maybe you. All you have
to do is stay one night in their cozy beachfront
bungalow, collect 10 "treasures", and the entire
bundle is yours! What could be easier?

Probably a lot of things, but there's a lot of
money at stake here, and *above all*, you don't want
your rotten Cousin Herman to get it! Just thinking
of all the mean tricks he played on you during your
youthful summers at the bungalow is enough incentive
to get you going.

<img class="float-right" src="/public/img/articles/cgw-scorpions-tale-hollywood-hijinx/hollywood-hijinx-cover.jpg" alt="Hollywood Hijinx cover">

So, now the funeral is over and you're standing
outside the bungalow, by the statue of that macho
screen star, Buck Palace, the Fighting Mailman.
From here, there are several ways to go. Hi jinx is
non-linear, and most (but not all) of the puzzles are
stand-alone; you can solve them in any order.

A quick tour of the grounds is a good idea.
While the number of locations in all is pretty small,
it helps to know your way around when you need
to move fast. Although you might want to stay out
of the hedge maze until you have the map (with the
map, there is no trouble at all getting where you
need to go, but it's a rather tedious route in and
back, sigh).

Getting into the house itself is not difficult,
even though the door is locked. Just pay careful
attention to the poem on the back of Uncle Buddy's
photo and you should be inside pretty quickly
(warning: the poetry is bad, even by Vogon standards).

Indoors, you'll find a number of interesting
places to explore. The Game Room, for instance,
which has a scale model of Tokyo, complete with
Atomic Chihuahua. However, it's not the dog
you're after, but the Big Diamond Ring (from the
movie of the same name) that you want. Unfortunately,
the model is covered by a heavy plastic
dome, and there's no way to move it.

Careful examination shows five buttons just
outside the dome. I wonder what they do? There's
only one way to find out! Just be sure to save the
game BEFORE you start fiddling with those buttons
(personally, I thought this was the most fun
part of the whole game). And remember to save the
heat for last.

<figure class="float-left">
	<img src="/public/img/articles/cgw-scorpions-tale-hollywood-hijinx/backlot.jpg" alt="Back lot at B B Studios">
	<figcaption>The back lot at B B Studios</figcaption>
</figure>

Of course, you won't want to overlook the private
screening room, complete with theater seats
and its own projection room. Curious place, that
projection room, it has both a slide projector and a
film projector. Synchronicity is the key here.

Along the way, you've probably been finding
some colored punch cards. Count them carefully.
There are seven in all and you'll need every one of
them. While most are right there in plain sight, one
or two may not be so easy to find. It helps to be
thorough in your searching.

Naturally, there is a connection between the
cards and the super-hi-tech (prop) computer in the
basement. It takes no great leap of logic to decide
the cards go into the machine....but in what order?
Ah, that's the question! Keep your mind on business,
and who knows what you might end up with!

You don't need me to tell you about the fireplace,
a favorite area in any adventure for explorations,
but those three patriotically-hued statuettes
on the mantlepiece deserve close inspection. They
will be helpful in more ways than one.

Before long, you will have probably discovered
the not-very-well-hidden wall safe. Do save the
game before you start messing around with the
combination dial. If you make a mistake, you'll be
out of luck (somewhat like the trunk in Sorcerer,
you must be right the first time).

<figure class="float-right">
	<img src="/public/img/articles/cgw-scorpions-tale-hollywood-hijinx/a-corpse-line.jpg" alt="Actors from the fictitious "A Corpse Line" film">
	<figcaption>A scene from "A Corpse Line", Burbank's lost masterpiece.</figcaption>
</figure>

When you make your way up to the second floor
(having first figured out a way past the staircase,
which has a distressing tendency to flatten out
when you try to walk up), you will probably be a
little disappointed. There isn't really much up there.
Oh, there are a couple of items to add to your collection,
but most of the rooms are just, well, rooms.
Even the one with the fancy brass handles in the
floor is merely, so to speak, "for show".

However, that panel in the ceiling of the middle
hallway is a definite attention-grabber. Too bad
there's no way to open it from this side. Really,
you'll just have to think of some other way of getting
up into the attic. It pays to stay on top of
things in this case. That's all I have to say on this
matter. I refuse to leak any further information.

Getting back down to earth again (really down),
the crawl space under the parlor has some attractions
of its own. Unfortunately, there seems to be a
small area that you just can't reach; part of the
floor above is blocking the way. How inconsiderate!

Well, you certainly can't let that stop you (not
when you've been doing so well up to this point!).
Pay careful attention to the ceiling in the southern
half of the crawl space. And don't be afraid to be
pushy.

Round about now, you should be pretty much
finished with the house. If you've been into the
hedges, you have eight goodies, or seven if you
haven't (this does not especially matter, as the maze
can be done at any time).

So you're thinking about those beach stairs, the
ones with a few steps missing about half-way
down. Terrible, how things have deteriorated since
your childhood days. Actually, it's more than terrible,
since you can't jump over the gap, and there's
no rope anywhere. Life is hard.

Still, moaning about it won't do much (except
maybe put the estate in Horrible Herman's hot little
hands). I wouldn't give you a snow job; there's a
fast and easy way of going down those very stairs,
one that will get you to the bottom before you can
hardly draw a breath.

Whew! A fast trip indeed, and now you're on
the beach at last. Both the green match and the
smoldering fire are important (which reminds me: I
hope you haven't used the red match yet). Of
course, it's your job to figure out in what ways.

While you think about it, a quick stroll of the
area is in order. You'll find it to be a very small
area, at that. The only place of interest is the small
grotto. Which doesn't appear to hold anything of
interest, except water. Well, I'm sure that sometime
in the past, Herman told you you were all wet.

The only problem with being in the dark is that
you can't see. This is actually a bigger problem
than it sounds, because while you can walk around
in the dark, you can't OPEN anything in the dark.
At least you don't have to worry about Grues. On
the other hand, a light source would certainly come
in handy right about now.

And there is the trick, getting a usable light
source with you into the bomb shelter (so? what
did you think was on the other side of the hatch,
eh?). This is probably the most difficult puzzle in
the game (now watch everyone tell me later they
got this one right off). But I'm not going to wax
prolific on this one, you'll have to figure it out on
your own.

Once you can see again, a very strange sight will
meet your eyes. A large safe suspended by a rope,
a sawhorse with a plank, hooks in the wall, a hatch
and a greasy chain. What a combination! I recommend
making a rough diagram of the set-up, which
will help to make things much clearer. I also recommend
opening the hatch before doing anything
else.

Naturally you have a burning desire to get your
hands on the safe, or rather, its contents. This may
not be easy. Once you get the safe down (which is
not hard), you have to get it open (which IS hard).
Yes, it's another combination lock. And yes, you
have to get it right the first time, just like with the
other one.

However, there's nothing around with anything
that looks like it might be the combination. Nothing,
that is, except the small plaque on the door.
Hmmmm. Could there be a clue here? Possibly
several clues? There sure are, and you can count on
that.

Now the rest is easy (or ought to be!), and before
long you should be out of the shelter and up
the slope with another treasure in hand. A brief
stop at the cannon (too obvious to mention!), and
you're ready for the end game (that is, when you've
picked up the 10th and last goodie; if you haven't
done the maze yet, hop to it!).

Bet you didn't think you'd end up in a prop
vault, eh? Well, let me give you a little clue. That
buzz saw is no prop, it's for real. You don't have
much time here (you probably figured that out already
by yourself), so you must act quickly! All I'll
say is: third time lucky. Good luck!

Well, I see by the old invisible clock it's that
time again. If you need help with an adventure
game, you can reach me in the following ways:

On Delphi: Stop by the GameSIG (under the
Groups & Clubs menu). On GEnie: Visit the Games
RoundTable (type: Scorpia to get there). On The
Source: Send SMAIL to ST1030. By U.S. Mail
(please enclose a self-addressed stamped envelope if
you live in the United States): Scorpia, PO Box 338,
Gracie Station, NY NY 10028.

Until next time, happy adventuring!

Copyright 1987 by Scorpia, all rights reserved.